Title: "Seeking Ginny"
Author: Casca
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Through Goblet
Classification: Post-Hogwarts H/G
Summary: Ginny Weasley has tried for
years to bring to an end to her feelings for Harry Potter… she's even uprooted
her life… but what happens when it's time to come face to face with him again?
A post-Hogwarts tale revolving around Ginny's discovery of herself…while coming
to terms with her feelings for Harry.…
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters
and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including
but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and
Warner Bros. Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark
infringement is intended.
Chapter Ten
The
twenty-four hours before the grand opening of Ginny and Sarah's shop found the
two business owners brewing what was left of their products and bottling it all
into the brand new packaging that had only just arrived from the labeling
company. The setting of this project consisted of the shop's rather dingy
basement and bubbling cauldrons from which a dozen different aromas rose.
Ginny
and Sarah had begun working at one o'clock on Thursday afternoon and by the
time midnight rolled around, they were so tired that Ginny could barely see
straight as she filled the jars. Sarah, who'd kept nodding off, took about
twenty minutes to finish each step in the creation process just to make sure she
was doing everything correctly. Then,
around four in the morning, their energy began to rise; they had taken a short
break to retrieve Ginny's wireless from her bedroom at home and the music
helped, as did the brief change of scenery. Before they knew it, they had
energy in abundance. The scents rising from the cauldrons were welcoming and
they sung loudly to the tunes, laughing and working quite efficiently.
And
then came the fatigue—it hit them like a hippogriff stampede on Friday
afternoon, exactly twenty-four hours after they had begun. When Ginny stood up
from the stool she had been sitting on for the past thirteen hours, her knees
buckled and she allowed herself to plop unceremoniously onto the stone
floor.
"Ouch,"
she said, and stayed there because she was too tired to get up. Sarah's voice, however, cut through the fog
in her brain. Sarah tended to mumble
while she worked, but this time, her words caused Ginny to narrow her eyes
suspiciously.
"Well,
I can't really believe it, but I think it's true, isn't it, if my calculations
are correct, I can only assume that it means we're finished, but is that really
possible, I mean to say…" Sarah continued to mumble to herself, but Ginny,
having caught only two words in her entire ramble, gaped at Sarah.
"What
do you mean, we're finished?"
"I
mean we're… done. Right? Let me see… yes… if that's correct," she
muttered, looking around at the mess and scratching her head, "it means …
we're actually done." Sarah
hopped off her stool with a great deal more grace than Ginny. "If you count all of these boxes and
multiply them by twelve - the number of bottles in each – well, except for the
extra large jars of the Self-Massaging Foot Cream, only six jars to each box—or
is it seven? Well, anyway, if you count the boxes of twelve - you'll see that
we have enough to stock the shelves three times over which would mean that
we've actually met our goal! We're done!"
"Are
you sure?" Ginny asked, still on the floor, looking around at the cartons
and cartons of products stacked around the dusty basement.
"Yes!
Because each carton has a dozen products—except for the extra large jars of the
Self-Massaging Foot Cream, as I said, but anyway, I don’t think that people
will really want the huge jars since it will be the first time they're using
the products, so we can get away with half of those." Sarah moved around
the room as she spoke, floating the cartons one by one up the stairs and into
the shop as Ginny watched, helpless. "So anyway, we have eight cartons of
each product and room for two out on the shelves right now so there you go – we
can refill three times, after we stock the initial two boxes. And don't forget
I'll brew more as we go. I mean I doubt we'll be selling out of things right
away and—"
Ginny
nodded as Sarah kept reasoning, then pulled herself from the floor and dusted
the dirt off her jeans. "All right, sounds good. Shall we stock the
shelves, then?"
Sarah
waved her hand at Ginny – unfortunately it was her wand hand, which sent a box
of Wrinkle-Vanish Ointment hurtling across the room; it nearly spilled before
Sarah hastily righted it. "Oops.
No, we don’t have to stock the shelves.
I told Rosemary to come by tonight to do it. She has a copy of the diagram we wrote and I
went over it with her when she was here the other day, I even drew another one
with more detail so that she'll be able to handle it."
"Oh,"
Ginny said, looking around. "Are
you sure she can handle it all?"
"Oh,
she'll be fine, she's glad to earn the extra gold. And there isn't that much
left, Ginny, all she has to do is…" Sarah kept talking, pushing a plait of
hair over her shoulder with her arm as she continued to float the cartons
upstairs. Since she flat-out refused to work for Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes,
Sarah's cousin had agreed to work for Ginny and Sarah for as much as they could
afford to pay her.
The
two chatted a bit more as they climbed the stairs into the shop, then parted
ways outside. Ginny considered for a
moment that she was too tired to Apparate, but realized that it would take an
even bigger effort to walk to the joke shop to use the twins' fireplace—she
hadn't stocked floo powder in her own shop yet.
Adding
that to the long list of things to do before tomorrow morning, Ginny pulled out
her wand and concentrated on clearing her mind so that she didn’t wind up
splintched a day before the grand opening.
The cluttered worktop of the Burrow kitchen came into view and she
sighed with relief. No body parts were
missing.
"Hey,"
she said to Ron, who was sitting in the kitchen and looking at a copy of the
Daily Prophet that lay on the table in front of him. "Aren’t you supposed
to be… what's wrong?"
Ron's
brow was drawn, his face pale. Wordlessly, he picked up the copy of the Daily
Prophet and handed it to her.
Ginny
looked down at the paper in confusion for a moment, then she saw the headline
of the front page article:
Eleven-Year-Old Son
of Ministry Executive Killed by Captor
How Harry Potter Risked his Life to Save the Boy
Ginny
looked up at Ron, horrified.
"How—what happened—?"
"Just
read it."
She
pulled out the nearest chair and sat as she began to read the article:
Late last night, ten year old
Details are unclear as to how the
boy was killed, but sources say that Shacklebolt lead his team of aurors to a
house where they believed the boy was being held. The rescue mission tragically
failed when the young boy was caught in crossfire.
A photograph below shows Devon
Forthwright with his father promoting Devon's favorite Quidditch team, the Chudley
Cannons, at a game held in
Ginny's
eyes found the huge photograph of Devon Forthwright – a dimpled grin minus two
front teeth beamed up at her beneath a Cannon's hat.
"My
God," Ginny whispered.
"Yeah,"
said Ron, his voice rough. He cleared
his throat.
"Have
you spoken to Harry?" she asked, swallowing hard, tearing her eyes away
from Devon Forthwright's face. It was Julian in a few short years.
"No…
I've just read this… Hermione owled it to me, she's trying to finish up with
work, but there's something really important she had to do there and…the hell
with it, she should just leave!" he exploded. "She works like a bloody
house-elf!"
Ginny
looked up at Ron. "She's probably
torturing herself about how hard she's been on Harry. Maybe work is her
escape."
"Yeah,
well, that's ironic, don’t you think? Anyway, I haven't exactly been
supportive," Ron admitted gloomily.
"What
do you mean?"
"Well,
I don’t give him grief about his job, but…" Ron shook his head. "I
haven't stood up for him either. It's just hard, being in the middle—"
Just
then, there was a tapping noise as Hedwig the owl landed on the
windowsill. Ron rushed to let her in and
didn’t even allow the poor bird to land before grabbing the parchment off her
foot. Ginny watched Ron's eyes scan the
letter as she reached out to stroke Hedwig.
"He's
in St Mungo's," he said at last, throwing the letter down and pushing back
from the table.
Ginny
stood up at once. "Is it
serious?"
He
pulled out his wand. "Doesn't sound like it. Look, don’t tell Mum yet, all
right? She'll go mental."
"Ron—"
"I'll
let you know as soon as I know something."
And he was gone with a pop.
Ginny
stood there in the middle of the kitchen, her heart pounding as the sunlight
poured through the window onto the table, illuminating both the letter and the
article. Ginny snatched up the parchment
and scanned it. Harry was very brief and
very vague, but the letter didn't read as though someone badly injured or very
ill had written it. At least that was
something. Closing her eyes, she set it down and rubbed at her temples.
After
letting an anxious-looking Hedwig out the window, Ginny made sure the letter
and paper had burned to a crisp in the fireplace before trudging upstairs to
her bedroom. There was more than enough
fatigue in her system to allow her a sleep; however, she spent a restless hour
trying to empty her mind of the thoughts that kept assaulting it. When she finally did fall under, it wasn't
very peaceful at all.
~*~
"It's
okay, Harry…Dumbledore is on his way, I've just sent for him."
Harry's
shoulder jerked. It could have been a
result of the pain or just a move to make it known that he had heard her. But Ginny knew there was a touch of humor in
that movement as if what she'd said was amusing. It filled her with a very dark and very cold
feeling.
"I
know there's probably nothing he can do for the pain," she whispered.
"But… well, perhaps something…"
Harry
didn’t respond, but Ginny knew that he'd heard her – every sound louder than a
minute whisper was probably equivalent to that of a siren in his head.
So,
she didn’t say anything more. She became
aware that her hand was on his back and though there hadn’t been a clear
thought in her head when she'd put it there, the contact suddenly became
real. She didn’t move it – he didn’t
seem to notice and maybe, just maybe, it was a small source of comfort. Maybe.
He
was seated on a snow-covered bench in the freezing dead of winter. His upper
body was bent so low that Ginny feared he would simply fall headfirst into the
thick layer of snow that covered the ground. His breaths were short and shallow
and every inflation of his lungs seemed to cost him dearly. Ginny's own breath was laden with shivers,
not only from the cold, but also from a dreaded, anxious feeling in the pit of
her stomach.
And
then, through the snow that had begun to fall only moments after she'd set out
on what was supposed to have been a leisurely walk, Ginny saw two figures. They were running directly towards Ginny and
Harry and as they neared, she recognized them.
While seeing those faces in a crisis had always made her feel safe, the
only feeling Ginny could muster was a sense of relief that she wouldn’t be
alone with him anymore. She felt more than inadequate here.
"Miss
Weasley? What happened?" barked the voice of Professor McGonagall.
"I
was out for a walk … Harry was sitting here and he…"
"My
scar."
They
all turned at the sound of his voice.
Harry had lifted his head; his eyes were unfocused without the shield of
his glasses, but they gazed past Ginny, past Professor McGonagall and right into
the eyes of the headmaster.
"He's
happy," Harry said in a voice that sent chills down Ginny's spine.
She
turned her face towards the tree a few yards away, unable to look at him. For no matter how exhausted and red-rimmed
Harry's eyes were, there was no ignoring the anger, the resolve, the violence
in the piercing green. It made her
absolutely terrified.
Harry
straightened, causing Ginny's hand to slide from his back. She brought it
around her front to clutch the other. It
must have subsided a little, the pain in his scar, because he sat up fully and
his breathing was now completely controlled.
Too controlled.
Ginny
stood and walked towards the tree, her booted feet crunching in the thick
snow. She heard them talking in low
voices while she stared at the castle and the figures running over the grounds,
darting around and heaving snowballs at each other.
Feeling
eyes on her, Ginny turned and saw that Professor McGonagall watching her. She nodded briefly, letting Ginny know that she
was excused if she wanted to leave.
Dumbledore and Harry seemed to be having a quiet conversation and Ginny
knew that there was nothing else she could do here. Thankful for the reprieve,
she hurried up to the castle, ducking her head against a sudden wind.
Something
had told her to take a walk this afternoon…she'd thought it had to do with
being locked inside all weekend with her heaps of homework. She'd thought it was because she needed some
fresh air.
Biting
her lip hard, Ginny turned on the path that would take her away from the
students playing in the snow. She
thought she could make out some faces and didn't want to be stopped by
anyone.
The
look in Harry's eyes remained at the forefront of her mind as she heaved the
huge wooden door open and stepped into the entrance hall…and the sound of his
voice echoed in her head, reporting on Voldemort's happiness as she walked
quickly up to
Her
dormitory was empty, which was a good thing because Ginny didn't think she
could hold it in any longer. Yanking her
bed-curtains closed, she climbed onto her four-poster and closed her eyes. Her sobs came in gasps of breath. She was crying because she was scared and
even though she knew it was useless, she couldn’t help but give into it.
Why
did it have to be him? Why?
Fury
welled inside her to the point of violence. She punched her pillow once,
twice. She was so scared of Harry dying
that she wanted to break something, hurt someone.
Please
let him live through this. Please don't
let him die…please…please….
A
horrible thought came into her head just then and Ginny had to squeeze her eyes
closed to rid herself of it.
So
what if he did live?
What if he did survive this, if Voldemort was killed and the world went back to
normal? Would Harry ever be
normal? Would he be able to sleep at
night? Would he ever feel safe and if he
did, would he have to spend his entire life reliving every horrible moment?
She
just wanted him not to hurt anymore. She
wanted it to be over with, to end, no more Voldemort or Deatheaters, no more
darkness, no more fear—
~*~
Ginny
awoke at once. Her heart was pounding
and her entire body was drenched in sweat.
For a moment, fresh fear gripped her throat… then it began to subside
slowly, bit by bit, as she breathed. Her bedroom was dark. The moonlight that shined into the room
through the window made her disoriented.
For a few moments, she didn’t know which day it was … or which
year.
She
pressed her palms to her eyes, trying to clear the fog that was floating around
in her head. Motionless, she lay back
against her pillow, breathing heavily and staring up at the dark ceiling of her
bedroom. Her limbs felt stiff and her mouth was dry. She remembered that she'd
gone to bed in the afternoon and now… it must be the middle of the night. After
several long, still minutes, she forced herself to move the covers that were
tangled around her legs and climb from the bed.
She stumbled into the loo where she stood in the shower for what seemed
like an eternity. As the water streamed
over her body, her mind began to clear.
She
had gone to bed in the afternoon because she'd been awake preparing for the
grand opening of the shop, which was… tomorrow morning. She breathed a small sigh as she stepped out
and wrapped a towel around herself. Part
of her wished that the opening wasn't so soon…it seemed a bit shallow to have
to focus on that tomorrow.
Ginny
dressed in a comfortable sweater and jeans and hurried downstairs to see if
there'd been any word from Ron. She
expected to find a letter, but to her surprise, when she stepped into the
kitchen, there was an actual person.
"Hi,
Dad," she said, startled to see him there. "What are you…?" Then
she saw the clock in the living room, which read half past nine. It wasn't nearly as late as she'd thought it
was.
"Worked
late," he said, pulling out a chair for her with one hand, while the other
used a fork to spear a piece of broccoli on his plate. "I heard you had a long day."
"Who
told you?" she asked, pulling the bowl of steamed vegetables towards
her. She realized that she was very
hungry.
"I
saw Ron earlier."
"Oh
– at St. Mungo's? Did you see Harry, is
he alright?"
"No,
I saw Ron at the Ministry—he'd just come from St. Mungo's. Harry's fine, they've patched him up, but he
has to stay the night for observation."
"Was
he badly hurt?"
Her
dad rubbed his eyes underneath his glasses.
"No. He caught the short end of a few hexes, but nothing
serious."
"Thank
goodness for that. Has there been any
word on…" She'd been about to say the Forthwrights, but realized that it
was a stupid question. Her father seemed to understand though.
"William
and his wife are doing as well as can be expected. Or so I've heard."
They
sat quietly for a moment, and then Ginny asked softly, "Did
you know them, Dad?"
Her
father sighed and placed his napkin next to his plate, smoothing out the creases
in an absentminded gesture as he thought.
"William was an acquaintance. I didn’t know him very well, but he
often brought his son to visit.
They
lapsed in silence then and Ginny was sure she knew what her father was feeling. Guilt, perhaps for being so lucky with his
family... and a keen sense of understanding as well.
"Where's
Mum?" Ginny asked then, wanting to change the tone of things.
"Asleep…
I think she had a bit of a long day.
Worrying over Harry and all that."
"Ron
must have told her, then. Where is he, do you know?"
"The
last I heard, he and Hermione were going to stop by St. Mungo's and then have a
late dinner somewhere."
Ginny
nodded and they lapsed into another silence.
"Well,"
Arthur said, wiping his mouth on a napkin and pushing back his chair. "I'm
going to bed. Big day tomorrow,
eh?" His smile was bright but it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Yeah,"
Ginny said, managing a smile of her own. "Goodnight, Dad."
"Goodnight,"
he said, squeezing her shoulder as he passed.
He held on just a second longer than he might have any other night
before disappearing upstairs.
Ginny
sighed and laid her head on her folded arms.
She sat quietly, listening to the noises of the house: the clock ticking
from the living room, the creaks from the attic, and the wind against the
windowpane. Without any warning, a chill
raced down her back. It was small and just a twinge of the feeling she'd felt
from her dream, but it represented something familiar. She shivered and hugged
herself, sitting back in the chair now and gazing out the window.
She
knew she was safe, but it was frightening that her life hadn’t always been so
secure. Ginny thought about those dark times and, though she remembered the
fear very well, she remembered action and determination and… bravery. And when
faced with the decision to fight or be safe, she remembered how clear the
answer had always been. How many risks had they all taken? How many times had they been close to death
and how many times had they saved each other?
Harry
came into her mind then and a flood of memories surrounded him. She could hear
his voice in each one, feel his protection as if it was palpable.
How
many times had he saved her life?
A
bout of guilt assaulted Ginny. She stood abruptly and walked into the living
room. But the dark and silent room did
nothing to help the apprehension that was squirming around inside her.
Ginny
didn’t know why these questions were at the forefront of her mind now, or why
she was feeling the presence of the war so vividly. The nightmare? She tried to remember exactly what she had
dreamt, but she couldn’t conjure a physical picture of it in her mind. All that
remained was the feelings.
She
hated times like these… when something tragic happened and there was nowhere to
go but back in time.
Her
eyes fell on the clock again. It was almost ten. She knew it was too late to go, but something
made her think she could try. She went
upstairs and retrieved her wand from between her bedcovers and gave it a twist
to Apparate.
St.
Mungo's waiting area was quite empty when she stepped inside from the
street. There were four people seated in
the rows of uncomfortable-looking chairs: two small children sat on either side
of an irate-looking witch, all three of their faces the color of an orange and
an elderly wizard across the room eyed them disdainfully, sneezing a continuous
flutter of lady bugs into a bin.
Ginny
walked across the wide floor and approached the sleepy-looking welcomewitch at
the main desk. Dropping her voice to a
whisper, Ginny leaned forward a bit and said, "Hi, I'm here to visit Harry
Potter."
The
witch gave Ginny a complacent look. "Harry Potter is not a patient here,
sorry."
If
Ginny hadn't been in such a strange mood, she would have returned the witch's
smug smile. Instead, she straightened the handbag on her shoulder and said
calmly, "I know he's a patient here, I'm a friend of his. If you can tell him that Ginny Weasley is
here to see him, I'm sure he'll say it's all right."
The
witch didn’t look impressed. "I'm
sorry, but we do not have a patient here by that name. Also, our visiting hours
are—"
"I
know. But if you can see if he's awake and ask him, that would be great. If he's asleep, I'll leave, but if not…I'm
sure he'll be glad for the company," Ginny lied, sure that he probably
wouldn’t.
The
witch looked at Ginny for a long moment, as if contemplating doing what Ginny
suggested or calling for security.
"Look,
my brother Ron Weasley was just here, you'll probably see his name on the list.
He was here with Hermione Granger."
With
a suspicious crease in her brow, the witch began tapping her long fingernails
at a gilded keyboard, watching as tiny words appeared in mid-air, disappearing faster
than Ginny could read them.
"One
moment, please," she said, her eyes level with the space in front of
her. A moment later, more words began to
appear and disappear there and Ginny saw her lift a brow. She reached into a drawer and pulled out a small
piece of parchment, and began to write something on it. "There you are,
miss."
Ginny
took the paper, frowning at the words on it. It read Floor Five, room 599. The fifth floor was the gift shop level and
though Ginny was certain that there were probably rooms hidden for… particular
patients, she had no idea where to find them. It took a bit of creativity and
the help of an elderly custodian before she finally walked through a tapestry,
leading her to a very hidden corridor with doors packed on either side. Room 599 was at the very end, and Ginny
walked down, stamping her curiosity to peek inside the open doors to see if the
rooms contained anyone famous.
Harry's
door was closed, so she tapped her knuckles against it lightly, and pushed
through when she heard his muffled reply. It was a small room, but much bigger
than it seemed from the corridor where another door stood just a few feet away.
The only light came from a candle on the table next to the bed and the tiny
dots of gold from the city in the window. Everything from the brass handles on
the bed to the linoleum floor glinted from the shadows cast by the flickering
candlelight and shined from cleanliness.
Harry
was sitting at a small table beside the window, peering towards the doorway
where she stood. He looked weary and a
bit pale, but there wasn't anything horrid about his appearance. Ginny didn’t
know if she'd expected him to look sick or injured, but he looked fine… just
very tired.
"Hi,"
she said, stepping hesitantly inside.
"I hope you don’t mind that I came. I just…." she paused, and
because he looked curious and not put out, Ginny continued honestly,
"Harry, I wanted to tell you how sorry I am about what happened. I know…
how hard you've been working and I …well, I'm just … sorry…."
Harry
held her gaze for a minute, looking unsure if she was finished or not. "Thanks." There was a pause before he said, "D'you
want to sit down?" He gestured to an armchair that was opposite his and
Ginny hesitated.
"Oh…
well, I didn’t plan to stay, I know you're probably tired."
"I
am. But I'm not going to sleep, so.…"
Something
about the way he'd said it made Ginny pause only momentarily before nodding and
crossing the room to join him at the table.
"What's that?" she asked, indicating the steaming goblet in
front of him.
Harry
looked at it with a bit of an ironic look on his face. "Sleeping
Draught."
"You
don’t want to take it?"
"I
already did," he said, lifting it to show it was empty. Ginny took it from
him and put it to her nose, then gasped at the wave of drowsiness that absorbed
into her senses from only breathing in the scent.
"That's
a strong one, isn't it?" she asked, setting it back down as the sleepy
feeling began to ebb away. "Did you
just take it?"
"About
twenty minutes ago."
Ginny
gaped at him. "And you haven’t
passed out yet?"
A
ghost of a smile appeared on his face and the sarcasm in it wasn't lost on
Ginny. "I'm a bit immune to those things."
She
said nothing for a moment as she regarded him.
His eyes, though red-rimmed and
surrounded by dark circles, were alert; his fingers tapped lightly, but
impatiently, against the surface of the table. Someone who looked so tired
shouldn’t seem this restless, she thought, and didn’t hesitated before asking
him,
"Do
you often have trouble sleeping, Harry?"
He
looked at Ginny for a moment, and turned his head towards the window, taking a
slow breath. Then, still gazing out at the city below them, he nodded his
head.
Ginny
suddenly thought of the difficult time she'd had trying to fall asleep this
afternoon. The horrible images of that boy being killed had been such a strong
shield against sleep and when fatigue finally had claimed her, the haunted
dreams had taken over. For Harry, having
that boy's kidnapping at the forefront of his mind for several months meant
more sleepless, haunted nights than Ginny wanted to imagine. And that was only
one case, one example of the dark things he dealt with at work.
"There
has to be something," she said thoughtfully, "some way to help
insomnia without potions or magic…."
"Firewhisky."
Ginny's
eyebrows shot up, remembering that evening in The Three Broomsticks. "It
really works, does it?"
Harry
heaved a sigh. "Yeah. But it's not
so fun in the morning."
She
smiled. "Have you talked to anyone
about it? One of the healers here
might—"
He
gestured to the goblet. "Talked to
dozens of them. They keep giving me stronger stuff and I keep taking it until
it doesn't work."
Ginny
frowned. She had a few suggestions of different
types of Sleeping Draughts that she remembered, but reasoned that they were
probably old news to him.
"I
suppose you just have to keep trying," she said at last. "Horrible that you have to suffer until
you find the solution."
Harry
arched his brow and muttered faintly that he didn’t think there was a solution.
Ginny looked down at the table, feeling a wave of déjà vu wash over her. Something in the tone of his voice …it was
all so familiar to her. She cleared her
throat.
"Did
you have many visitors today, then?"
"Just
Ron and Hermione… and some of the people who were working on the case. Your mum sent me food, of course."
Ginny
smiled at that. "It's her way, isn't it?
Did Hermione walk in with her tail between her legs?" she'd asked
with a bit of a humorous tone, but Harry's eyes turned inward.
"She…
yeah, she did."
"You
feel guilty about her, don’t you?" Ginny asked, looking at him closely.
Harry
shifted uncomfortably. "She was really ashamed. I never wanted that. I
don’t want…."
"You
don’t want your work to affect them."
"It's
not just that. It's horrible to say, but I see this sort of thing – not very often, but enough, so they don’t
have to feel sorry for me when something like this happens… I mean, if only she
would stop giving me grief about everything, then she wouldn’t feel guilty
and…"
"It's
like … she creates the guilt for herself sometimes?"
"Yeah,"
he said, looking relieved. "But she means well, so it's …it's not like she
deserves to feel so terrible. I don't want her to feel like that…it's
just…"
Ginny
smiled as he failed to get his tongue around the words. "I think you might
need a holiday, Harry."
He
managed a week smile. "I just had a holiday."
"When?"
"
"I
though your were working there."
"Well,
it was actually a bit of a break," he admitted, giving into a yawn. "And not an approved one."
"Those
meetings you talked about and the auror's convention…?"
Harry
shook his head. "I didn’t need to go to those meetings … or the
convention, really," he said, his voice thick from yawning. "I thought being away might help with
the insomnia thing, but I really wasn't supposed to go to
"That's
right," Ginny said, recalling the letter she'd received from her mum in
"Yeah…
that was a top secret thing. It was rather… stressful. And I didn’t feel like
going home afterwards, so I went to a stupid convention in
"And
you didn’t write home…" she said, almost to herself. She remembered everything now… everything
that her mum had written to her and everything that she and Harry had fought
about in
"So,
you left for a job that took three months... and when you arrived in
Harry
looked up at her. His glasses were off
and his green eyes were watery and drowsy, but very focused on her. "Yes."
She
sighed. "Then why didn’t you? I
mean, just to tell them that you were all right—it's understandable that you
would need a break, isn’t it? Especially after a case that lasted for months
like that one and… hang on." She closed her eyes and shook her head.
"I'm doing it again, aren't I? Sticking my nose into your business."
He
half shrugged. "S'okay. If I had written home, I would have received
howlers in return."
"I
don’t think that's true," Ginny said. "They couldn’t possibly blame
you for leaving without notice if you had no choice."
"They
wouldn’t. But they would blame my job, Ginny.
They would think I’d chosen it over them
or something. I didn’t need for them to make me guilty about what I do for a
bloody living so I prolonged writing to them."
Ginny
started to say something, but the truth was that she didn’t know what to
say. Having a job like Harry's where he spent
so much of his time and energy, where he had to disappear without notice and be
away for so long… it wasn't easy on the people who cared about him. But it
couldn’t be easy on him either. And if
it wasn't so very important to him, if it didn’t define who he was, then Ginny
might almost think he should
put his family first….
But
then … his family consisted of two people, basically: Ron and Hermione. Two
people who were about to be married, who were about to become one unit, one
family by themselves. What sort of family did Harry have to himself? Why should
he put aside his job, his obligations, for them? They loved him, sure, but his place in life
was not with them.
"Anyway,
I suppose that was why I was a bit … strange in
Ginny
sighed, trying not to let her thoughts run away with her. "I was also
pretty stressed when you were there," she said slowly. "I suppose we
both had a lot on our minds."
Harry
nodded. It was an apology, on both their parts, for something Ginny had forced
herself to forget about. There had been quite a bit to that little row, hadn’t
there?
"Do
you miss it there?"
Harry's
voice cut through her thoughts and Ginny suddenly realized that she was staring
out the window in silence.
"
"Studying?"
He managed half a smile.
"No,
I don’t miss studying," she laughed, "but... the lessons, the
professors, well some professors.
Others I'll gladly never see again."
"Really?"
he asked, looking mildly interested.
"Worse than certain… Potions professors?"
"Oh,
definitely not," she grinned. "But there were some winners, I'll say
that." Because he appeared slightly
interested, Ginny told him a few stories about several professors she'd had the
fortune to encounter at university and Harry listened to her with the sort of
interest of someone who needed something to help pass the time. Ginny felt
rather sorry that he had to resort to listening to tales that were probably
quite boring to someone who hadn't experienced them.
"I
think I still have nightmares about her," she admitted after she'd told
him about her Mermish professor, Madame Horne.
"People used to cry when her little timer would go off, signaling
the end of the exam. Brian liked
her—well, any wizard in the lesson liked her, for … well, slightly shallow
reasons."
"I
think I understand."
"Yeah…and
she favored boys over girls, so that
only gave them more encouragement.
Though Brian never needed any encouragement for that," she added
dryly.
Ginny
chatted a bit more about
"Do
you think you'll be able to go home tomorrow? Have the healers said anything
about it?"
"I'm
leaving even if they say I can't," he said irritably. "I don’t even need to be here right now,
it's auror protocol to stay and all that, but it's stupid. I don’t have
anything wrong with me."
"I
suppose you would be more comfortable in your own house, in any event. Was anyone else injured?"
He
nodded. "Nothing serious, same as me.
It was an ugly fight, though…"
Ginny
looked down at the table. She had questions,
but she didn’t want to force him to recall the last twenty-four hours for any
reason.
"He
recognized me," Harry muttered, rubbing his tired eyes beneath his
glasses. "When I came in, he saw me and … and he thought I was going to
save him. He looked at me like I … I was
his hero or something…." He
swallowed as if he had suddenly acquired a bad taste in his mouth. "Me."
Ginny
watched him take a long sip of water from the glass on the table. "So he was… happy, then. For just a
moment."
"For
just a moment," he echoed. Then he
nodded, and took another sip. "So, er… how is that shop thing of yours
coming along?" he asked, and Ginny took his cue without hesitation. She told him about all of it, the grand
opening tomorrow, what they had done to get to this point, and what they
projected in sales. It was simple, the
opening of a little shop, compared to the sort of things he accomplished day to
day and Ginny didn't mind offering it as an escape for him.
"What's
it called, again?"
Ginny
grimaced. "Lotion Lady. Don’t ask,
it was a very … last minute decision. I really don’t like it."
"Are
… you the Lotion Lady?" he
asked, with a bit of humor.
"Actually
it's Sarah. Sarah is the Lotion Lady. I'm … the other lady. I dunno, it's going to take a while to grow
on me."
"Could
be worse," he said on another huge yawn, which caused his eyes to water
up, which caused his glasses to
fog. He made a noise of frustration then
and took off his glasses again to wipe at his eyes. Then, yet another yawn
assaulted him. "Bloody exhausted, but can’t sleep," he said in sudden
frustration. He grabbed a tissue from a box on the table and blew his nose –
loudly – and tossed it in the bin.
"How stupid is that, I'd like to know?"
An
inexplicable feeling of sorrow shot through her. Ginny would challenge anyone
in the world to see him as she did right now and not want to help him.
"You
know," she began, not knowing what she was going to say, but vowing to
stay here talking until he was tired enough for sleep, "if
There
was a long pause where Harry stared down at the table with a bit of a dull
expression on his face. She knew he was tempted to end this conversation and he
could have rightfully done so by saying he wanted to go to bed. It would have been a lie, and they both would
have known it, but she would have left regardless. She watched him struggle with it for a
moment.
"I…
heard it's really crowded in there," he said after a moment.
"It
is," she said at once, and elaborated fully on the subject, if only to
delay his bedtime even further.
"I've always thought how cool it would be to go inside at night,
you know, after closing? I mean during
the day the people are packed in there like sardines, but to go through it all
with nobody else in there and see all the paintings and the sculptures
and…."
It
was almost one o'clock in the morning when Ginny left St. Mungo's. She walked across the waiting area with a
heavier heart than when she'd first arrived, not even noticing the arched brow
from the welcome witch as she watched her leave.
~*~
Sarah,
in her perpetual state of nervousness, also had a nightmare before the grand
opening. In it, the only customer that came into the shop was a person they
knew quite well and she wasted no time telling Ginny and Sarah how disappointed
she was with the career path they'd chosen and requested a product that Sarah
refused to repeat.
"That’s
what made it a nightmare," she shuddered.
"Who's
McGonagall?" asked Brian.
"One
bitch of a witch," said Rosemary, grinning.
"Professor
McGonagall is the most brilliant witch of our time," Sarah said firmly,
frowning at her cousin.
"Just…slightly scary at times."
"Hey,
that was a compliment!" Rosemary
insisted.
Rosemary,
it turned out, had changed quite a bit over the years. No longer was she the mousy girl with
pigtails Ginny remembered, but nearly a whole foot taller than her cousin with
a rather exuberant style of dress. Her
brown-turned-black hair and purple lipstick clashed startlingly with her pale
skin and if Ginny hadn't asked her to wear Lotion Lady's colors for work then
she would most definitely be sporting her ankle-length, chain-clad black
robes.
Everyone
was scattered throughout the shop, waiting for the clock to chime so that they
could open the doors. Fred and George
were going to stay behind the scenes, getting more product if needed. Ginny and Sarah were going to work on the
floor, assisting customers with products and Rosemary would mind the till. Brian was quite useless, but he had brought
breakfast, which Ginny's nervous stomach hadn't allowed her to eat.
Ginny
tried to reassure Sarah that McGonagall wouldn't be disappointed in them at all
– that owning a shop was very prestigious and look at how often she visited
Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes!
Sarah
sniffed. "That's only because she
thinks Fred and George are devising a quill that looks like her anti-cheating
ones."
Fred
and George looked startled. "How
d'you know that?"
"She
told me," Sarah said, her brow still drawn from worry. "She's onto your Forging Quills, too, so
you had better watch out."
If
there hadn't only been ten minutes until they opened, Ginny would have found it
amusing how a half-hearted warning from someone as harmless as Sarah could
cause such alarm on the faces of her brothers.
But she had one thing on her mind and that was the shop.
Things
started off a bit slow. Ginny had to
bite hard on her lip to keep from laughing at Sarah when the bells over the
doors jingled and Professor McGonagall herself walked in. She peered at Brian in a scrupulous sort of
way (he straightened his back), said to Rosemary in her clipped tone,
"Miss Shawnessy", and congratulated Ginny and Sarah on their
wonderful new business (Ginny stood on Sarah's foot). Then she said something
about needing a Christmas gift and walked brusquely towards the anti-wrinkle
section.
"Christmas
gift my arse," Rosemary muttered with a wink and Sarah sent her a warning
look.
Other
people trickled in, mostly friends and relatives to congratulate and support
them. Sarah voiced her worry that they
were fast running out of friends and Ginny shushed her, but secretly thought
the same.
By
lunchtime, however, all was chaos. Ginny
had to enlist Brian to help at one of the tills, direct Fred and George to
bring more stock from the basement and even beg Bill to stay for an hour to
cover Rosemary's lunch. Customers piled
in, purchasing more in one sale than Ginny thought would sell all day… even
week! People from all ages roamed the shop, stuffing as many products as they
could into their wicker shopping baskets, some needing two or three baskets just
to carry everything around.
At
one point, Ginny thought that she might still be asleep and having another
dream, this one being really good to make up for the nightmare, but when she
banged her hip against the counter as Brian carelessly bumped into her, the
pain was very real and made her realize that it was no dream. It was all real. And it was a success.
At
least for the moment.
"Hey,
Ginny, where's Ron?" called Dean Thomas with an armful of rose-scented
products
"Not
sure, he and Hermione were supposed to come." Then her lips quirked at the
products in his hands. "Buying a gift?"
"My
Mum for Christmas – she loves Sarah's stuff, she's tried it before—"
He
was cut off by a crashing noise and Ginny looked across the aisle just in time
to see a shelf of foot cream crash to the floor and a guilty looking young girl
dive for her mother.
"Oh,
no – have to run – thanks, Dean!"
By
the time it was over, Ginny felt as though she'd pulled a double shift at the
café—alone because Aurelie had skived off.
The thought of her friend made Ginny smile as she, Sarah and Rosemary
cleaned up the mess that was left. Fred
and George left to close down each joke shop and Brian had gone a few hours
ago. It occurred to Ginny that she hadn't even thanked them for all their hard
work… she hadn’t thanked Bill either for covering for Rosemary or Emma for
sending over a carton of butterbeer for everyone. In fact, Ginny had a long list of people to
thank… except for Ron and Hermione. She frowned and wondered if everything was
okay with the two of them – Hermione had promised that they would come.
Clean-up
took just over an hour and after bidding farewell to Sarah and Rosemary, with
promises of bright and early the next morning, Ginny Apparated home. She'd gone right into the kitchen, where she
thought her mum and dad would be waiting to see how everything went. But the kitchen was quite empty and
voices—rather loud voices—could be heard coming from the living room.
"I
just don't understand why you can’t get married before you go," her Mum
was saying. "We can have something
small instead, something—"
"There's
no time, Mum," Ron interrupted impatiently. "Hermione can’t even think about the
wedding right now, she's going to be working non-stop until we go—"
"Go
where?" Ginny asked and everyone looked at her in a startled sort of way.
"What's going on?"
"Never
you mind," her mother said sternly, as though she didn’t want Ginny to get
any ideas about doing whatever Ron was.
"Now,
Molly," Arthur said from his position in his armchair. "There's no need to snap at Ginny. Look, I think we've exhausted this
conversation, let's leave Ron to fill Ginny in and—"
"I'm
sorry, Arthur, I just can’t see how you can be okay with this. They're not married, it's not right—"
"He's
an adult, he's been of age for years, he can do whatever he wants—"
"He
is still living in my house!" Molly said angrily.
"Not
anymore," yelled Ron and stormed up the stairs, taking two at a time. The house rattled as his bedroom door slammed
closed.
Ginny
looked at her parents in surprise. Her mum's lips were thin as she stood and
retreated into the kitchen; her father gave her a small smile. "Ron will fill you in, why don’t you go
on up?"
She
didn’t need telling twice. She rapped on
Ron's door loudly before pushing it open.
The site that met Ginny caused her mouth to drop. For as long as she could remember, Ron's room
had not changed at all. The Chudley
Cannons and the orange and the comics and the old Quidditch equipment thrown
around haphazardly had always been the site that greeted her. Now, however, it looked as though a handful
of pixies had been thrown into the room and left to their own devices. There were clothes everywhere, bedding piled
in a corner, posters hanging off the walls, and Ron's open trunk in the middle
of it all.
"Where
are you going?" she demanded.
Ron
puffed out a disgruntled sigh.
"
He
explained nothing more, but began yanking drawers open and pulling out even
more clothing.
Ginny
opened her mouth but nothing came out for a moment. "Erm… can I ask why?"
"Hermione's
been transferred there," he tossed a shirt over his shoulder into the
trunk. "And I'm going with
her."
"When
did this happen?" .
"Today. They just told her and she has to bloody
leave next week."
"For…ever?"
she asked, sinking down onto his cluttered bed and watching her brother wreak
havoc on his room.
He
blew out a breath and tried to push the piles of clothes further down into his
trunk. "No… yes… I don’t know. It's
not permanent, but we'll have to wait until, you know, or at least—"
"Hold
on," Ginny said, putting a hand out.
"You are not making any sense, can you explain this to me properly,
please? How did Hermione get transferred?
Is it a promotion? And why is mum
going mental?"
But
Ron merely kicked his trunk, yelped in pain, and started taking everything out.
"Oh
for the love of—" Ginny took out her wand and used it to close the
trunk. Ron sent her a furious look and
tried to open it, only to realize it was locked.
"GINNY!"
he yelled and reached for his wand on his shelf, but Ginny was too fast.
"If
you want it back," she said, holding it up, "then you have to talk. Coherently."
He
made another, much louder noise of frustration, kicked the trunk even harder
and all but fell onto his bed.
From
his jumbled explanation, Ginny gathered that the funding for Hermione's Muggle
remedies research was to be tripled in the new year, giving the project the
opportunity to expand to other countries.
Hermione had been asked to go to
"That's
amazing! Of course she has to go—"
"Yeah,
try telling mum that."
"Why
doesn’t she want—"
"Well,
it's me she has a problem with. She thinks it's not "proper" if I go
because space is limited and we'll have to live together."
"Oh,
she's so old-fashioned!" Ginny exclaimed.
"Yeah,
and I'm not letting her go alone, so mum can forget it. Some of the areas over
there aren’t very safe and all that."
Ginny
nodded fervently, managing a straight face.
If Hermione were here, Ron would certainly not get away with saying he
wasn't 'letting' her do anything.
"So
she wants you to push up the wedding so that you can be legally married before
you go?" Ginny had to smile. "Well, that's mum, isn’t it? I don’t
understand though, she let me live with Brian in
Ron
gave Ginny a look. "That was
because you were all alone in another country, Ginny."
"Oh,
come off it, Mum didn’t have any problems with me going away—"
"She
was bloody thrilled when you told her about Brian—er, since she knew that you
were only friends, that is. Do you think
she'd let you live with Brian now?"
"Well—"
No,"
he answered for her. "Trust me,
she's still mental about it, it's like she tries to control us for as long as
she can—because soon, she won’t be able to control any of her children anymore and then
what will she do with her time?"
"I
don't think that's true—she only wants the best for us, Ron. She'll give you her blessing, I know she
will."
"Probably
not—I don’t bloody care anyway—"
"Yes,
you do care. And yes, she will – dad
will talk to her."
Ron
just threw his arms up in the air and looked around the room miserably. "Hermione will kill me when she sees
this mess. She told me to pack
efficiently for once in my life."
"Some
things never change, doesn’t she know that? "
"Hey—THE
GRAND OPENING!" he said so loudly, his mirror shook. "How did
it—"
"Fantastic,
we sold triple what Fred and George projected. But, anyway—"
"Excellent,
so can you give me some for Hermione for Christmas?"
"Yeah,
sure, but I was going to ask what you're going to do with your job at the
Ministry? Will you quit or—"
"Extended
leave of absence," he said. Then he
grinned. "My woman will support me until we get back."
Ginny
rolled her eyes. "You talk really
bravely when she's not around."
"Whatever…
look… help me, will you?"
"I
suppose," she sighed, tossing him his wand so he could open the
trunk. "Here, don’t do
anything." She waved her own wand, and pronounced a clear incantation. At
once, things began to fly around the room, arranging themselves into neat folded
piles in thin air, and landed gracefully into the trunk. "Is that all you have?"
Ron
looked at her in amazement. "That was good!"
"I've
had practice," she grinned, then a wave of sadness washed over her. "I can’t believe that you two are leaving.
I've only been back for a few months and…things are already
changing…" She watched the team
members in a Cannon's poster duck as Ron sent a shirt zooming past it into his
trunk; the poster fell sideways on the wall and the players toppled onto one
another.
"Oh,
don’t cast the water spells, okay?
Between you and Hermione, I can’t bloody take it!"
"I won't," she promised. "So… are you nervous?